A Court of Beasts and Yearning
by HighLady90
Summary: 50 years following the Hybern conflict, Tamlin, the High Lord of the Spring Court is in for an awakening. For years he has yearned for someone he cannot have. Tamlin is called to the Nigh Court on business, but a twist of events and his heart may never leave Velaris.
1. First Sight

_I've been toying with the thought of Tamlin's mate for a while now, and finally began writing something down. The first chapter will be in Rhysand's perspective of things then will lead into Tamlin's perspective. I hope you all enjoy!_ _*Possible Spoilers for ACOWAR.*_

50 years after the war with Hybern

 **Rhysand**

I slipped in silence from the vast space of the dining room to escape the feud that had erupted behind me. I had called everyone to the House of Wind that morning to discuss our upcoming meeting this afternoon. My head ached as I lifted my fingers to my temples and massaged the tender points. I had informed the inner circle that we would have a visitor coming to negotiate an alliance, and no one in particular was enthused by the news. I had sent word to the Spring Court months ago, in hopes that we could put our past quarrels aside and work together on the ever-pressing conflict with the continent. I had only received Tamlin's acceptance of the meeting the evening before, but with his acceptance came…conditions.

First, he had asked to be greeted by Feyre and Lucien personally. Fine, I could handle that, and Feyre I knew could handle herself. His second demand left me somewhat reluctant, and when I had told the others an outright frenzy had erupted. Tamlin's second demand was that he be shown Velaris. To better understand Rhysand's true nature. Over the fifty years following the conflict with Hybern, I had made an effort to embrace my true self, and walk my lands without the mask. The risk was great, but the benefit was something beautiful, rewarding even. Even those who dwelled in the court of nightmares had become less of a burden in wake of the changes. Although, I still held a slightly heavier hand when it came to ruling them.

A soft rustle of fabric on stone and the scent of ancient evergreen and jasmine filled the air. My mate. I turned to find her softly closing the door to the veranda with a half-smile settled on her beautiful full lips. She moved toward me slowly as her lips began to move, "I know that our…relations with the Spring Court are more than strained, but…" She paused and looked back toward the doors, "Rhys, the others have already given so much. I don't see Tamlin as a threat but with his temper he…Well, you know what he is capable of." A shudder ran through her figure and I stepped into her placing an arm around her waist. A smile touched her lips but did not meet her eyes as she gazed up at me. "Is now really the time? With…with everything going on. Between us? All of us?" she rested her hand on her stomach, and my heart fluttered with joy and wonder. It had only been three days since she had broken the news to me. How we were expecting our first child, and though I had wanted to shout to the world what she had told me I refrained.

Feyre had requested that we take our time in breaking the news. We had all been so strained by these new threats that it felt inappropriate to her to bring something like this up in wake of what was and is to come. I had obliged, even if the urge to tell everyone clawed at my skin every time I held a conversation. "I still can't believe it. The gift you have given me." I smiled and stepped back holding her at arms-length. She was glowing from head to toe. Her cheeks tinged a new shade of pink, and her eyes filled with wonder and starlight.

She stared up at me with a look of pure insistence. _As much as I love to hear that… don't change the subject._ Her words caressed my mind and her lips curled upward slightly in a grin. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, "I understand your concerns, I'm just...I'm at a loss. Helion could only help so much with the internal conflicts of his own court, and I didn't even consider Beron or the others. Tamlin and I have a history. A pretty messy one, but we have similar skills in combat, and tactics. He is truly our closest ally in this specific situation. If allowing him through the gates of Velaris is one of his requirements in trusting me further then I will gladly allow it." I frowned at her worried glance to the city. "Feyre, I will do all that is necessary to keep his temper under control during his visit. We have to trust that we can build a better standing with the other courts for the sake and future of our…" I reached to press a hand to her still slender belly but retracted my hand as a crisp scent of cool water, and night sky wrapped around us.

"High Lord." Aurelia bowed her head slightly and turned to Feyre, "And High Lady." She smiled at her something she rarely did with anyone, the two had become close in the past few decades, and Feyre had grown to care for her as she would a sibling. "Cassian has a proposal for you, and requests your presence." Always so formal. Aurelia had come to live in Velaris on my request. Cassian, Azriel, and I had first encountered her in the Illyrian training camp 20 years ago. Even then she was able to take down every opponent she faced, whether it be male or female. Her raw skill outweighed her training by far, and she was ahead of her band by centuries. It wasn't long before Cassian requested to spar with her, and not long after that Cassian found himself sprawled out on his back facing the sky. She had taken him down in only three minutes with minimal effort. That evening, Cassian had sought out her instructor and petitioned for her training to continue in Velaris one on one with none other than himself. She was a gifted warrior and we all took notice, but it was her grace and gentle heart that had hit me like a pit in my gut. So much like my mother. So pure and kind in all ways. She was strong, but she knew what was important in our eternal lives. She lived with honor in her mind and love in her heart. "Auri, I've told you a million times now, call me Rhys." She smiled and winced slightly nodding, "Of course, High…Rhys." Her face flushed pink and she turned to return to the room. In an instant, she vanished through the towering glass doors. I turned to Feyre and chuckled, "You know, as fierce as she is in combat, she really is quite…Reserved." Feyre shrugged and a small frown danced on her lips before she spoke, "We are the closest thing she has to a family Rhys. She's never known love and affection like most of us have." She gestured to the room full of our bickering friends. Our family. I sighed and shook my head, "Will you take her with you today? She and Cassian should be close when Tamlin arrives." I was being generous, but I wasn't a fool. I knew what I was sending Feyre into, and I would be damned if she went unprotected. It had been half a century since our small conflict, but who knew what Tamlin still carried begrudgingly. "If it will make you feel better then I don't mind." she smirked and looked up at me in that playful way of hers and whispered, "But Rhys, pregnant or not I can still lay him out." she smiled and turned toward the door then beckoned me to follow. I obliged, and laced my fingers with hers, lifting them to my mouth to kiss them softly before stepping through the glass doors.

 **Tamlin**

I winnowed into the thick spans of trees at the southern border of the night court just as I had been instructed by the return notice I had received. The vast thick of evergreens sprawled before the rugged mountain terrain. I took a moment to mentally map the scenery, in case it was needed in a quick getaway. I had agreed to come to the Night Court, but that didn't mean I was generally enthused. Though half a century had passed I still held reservations on whether I could truly trust Rhysand. After all these years could I forgive the man who aided in my family's murder? I wasn't innocent at the deaths of his, but what did making things equal create for either of us?

A gust of air behind me had me spinning to meet two Illyrian soldiers I recognized from the Hybern war. I nodded to both in greeting and addressed them personally. "Cassian." I nodded directly to him, and turned to the shadowsinger, "Azriel." A small nod and the two of them bowed their heads out of respect. The shadowsinger extended a hand and said, "Come with us, High Lord." I frowned slightly grabbing his forearm. "Rhys doesn't trust me to know where we are going then…" Azriel gave me a knowing look and shook his head, "Since the war the wards on the…palace have been amplified. Only those closest to the High Lord can winnow in and out." I sighed and nodded at the statement. I gave them a gesture to carry on, and in an instant of darkness and shadow, we stood in a grand foyer.

The walls of the building curled into high peaked arches. The obsidian stone glimmered in the light of the setting sun cascading from the open window. A whisper of wind floated past me carrying on it the scent of citrus and jasmine. I beheld the beauty of the sunset over the mountains as a voice sounded behind me. "Welcome, Tamlin." My body went taut as I spun on my heal to meet who that voice belonged to. She was just as beautiful as I remembered. _Feyre._ My mind purred her name and my heart squeezed, from hurt or pure adoration I could not tell. Her face was bright and had gained a healthy glow, her eyes glittered in the late afternoon light. She wore a dress of pure onyx, glittering stones of gold and white clustered on the bodice and reducing the further they fell down the skirt. She was radiant. A smile rested on her lips as she observed me and my gawking. I spoke to break the silence between us. "It's exactly how you described it all those years ago. Every detail." She smiled but her eyes told a story of pain and negligence. My negligence. I shook off the thought and moved closer to her extending my hand to take hers and place a kiss on her smooth skin. "High Lady." I murmured softly in greeting and smiled as genuinely as I could. Her skinned smelled heavenly. Fresh evergreen, and jasmine, but another scent wafted my nostrils and I stiffened, and lifted my head to her gaze.

She studied my face and returned my puzzled look. "Is something…wrong?" She frowned slightly and I shook my head to release myself from my overbearing thoughts. "I would assume congratulations are in order Feyre, you and Rhysand," I winced at their names being paired but continued, "Must be overjoyed. A true blessing." Her eyes shot open wide and she bit her lip puzzled. "How did you…" her question was halted by a male figure striding toward us. Just like that I heard her voice, but not aloud. She spoke to me mind to mind. _They don't know. Please, keep what you know to yourself._ I chuckled but winked at her in promise as Lucien strode toward us. He beamed at me, but I could sense his reservations.

In the years since the war he had visited the Spring Court sparingly. Once, only to bring Elain to see the rose gardens. I smiled at my once close friend warily and grasped his outstretched hand in a firm handshake. "Good to see you, old friend," I said stepping back from our handshake. The two of them looked between each other at my words and then back to me almost gaping, I rubbed my neck and looked up at them, "This isn't easy for me either, but while I'm here I want to try to leave what has happened where it belongs…in the past." Feyre and Lucien exchanged a glace and then both turned their focus to me. In unison, they whispered, "Agreed." I nodded and looked around the room for any sign of moment or life.

It was quiet. Too quiet for any sort of meeting that would take place between courts. "Where exactly is everyone?" I started when my observations came up unfulfilled. Feyre smiled softly and said, "You wished to see Velaris, the meeting will take place in the House of Wind, our formal meeting ground within the city." Her smile widened in some underlying promise and she spoke again, "The only problem is, we can't winnow in. The wards are ancient, and will not allow even High Lords to do so." She paused and glanced over her shoulder at the two towering males entering the hall before turning back to me, "So, our only choices of transportation are ten thousand stairs to the top or we hitch a ride." She smiled and pointed to Cassian and Azriel as they moved closer to us each sporting an interesting grin. I frowned as I took in her suggestion. _Well, this ought to be interesting._ I thought as I studied the two males.

Movement behind the warriors grabbed my attention and a female form appeared. The very ground beneath me shuddered as my gaze met hers. Her hazel eyes studied my face, and her full lips set into a soft pout of concern. Her flushed cheeks grew even more brilliant as she took in my gawking. It had to be what I was doing. I couldn't think, or breathe, or swallow. My stomach twisted, and my heart squeezed at her pure beauty. In an instant, I had gone from calm and collected to dizzy and unbalanced. A word crept its way into my mind. _Mine. She's mine._ I frowned internally at the primal instinct but continued to behold her face. She was so unearthly beautiful. Her sun-kissed skin accentuated by her dark hair. The small freckles that graced the bridge of her nose. The way she studied me, a puzzled quirk in her features. The primal voice inside continued its chanting and I tried to calm my nerves. _Mine. Mine. Mine. My Mate._ It whispered and taunted me.

I wanted to reach for her. Blurt everything I had felt here and now, but I kept a hold on the emotions swimming through me. The primal instinct to take her and make her mine. I took a deep breath before I spoke, my voice carrying just above a whisper, "What is your name?" It was all I could muster. My legs felt weak and my tongue dry. I had to know. I needed to know her. She shifted her eyes to study me further and stepped between the two Illyrian males. Her voice caressed my skin as she replied, "Aurelia, High Lord." She smiled genuinely and bowed her head in respect. I smiled in return and whispered, "It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Aurelia." I purred to her. She smiled and her cheeks flushed a deeper shade of pink. In that moment as the sun fell beneath the peaks of the mountains, leaving a sheen of warm light in its wake, I met her gaze once more and our mating bond clicked into place.

***That's all for now, I hope everyone enjoyed this first chapter. Next Chapter coming soon!


	2. Love and Regret

**Auriela**

My palms grew clammy as the High Lord looked me over. His forest green eyes seemed to smolder as they caressed every inch they laid upon. I had never felt so laid bare, and yet in that moment, I felt a soft tug. Like he had tied a knot in my belly and pulled me closer. He asked my name and every word was a sensual purr. My body responded, and I flushed with embarrassment. Could the others tell? What was this? I shook my head and replied, "Aurelia, High Lord." I gave him a half smile and tried but failed to hide my body's betrayal as the thin fabric of my dress pulled at the tightness in my breasts. I willed my body to calm but to no avail. He smiled at me again his grin turned almost feral as he looked me over once more. "It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Aurelia," he returned and dragged his eyes to meet mine once more. A whirl of light and stars speckled my vision and all at once my mind was heavy and light, dark and brightened.

My body relaxed in his gaze as we said nothing. Allowing our bodies to feel the full capacity of what was truly happening. _He's my…mate._ I thought as a wave of fear and something I didn't quite understand overwhelmed me. Was that love? Adoration? I didn't know. As a child, I had been denied the normalcy of affection by my parents. They didn't live long enough to truly show me anything but the inside of a sparring ring. I gave him a half smile out of confusion and understanding. _My mate._ I thought again and a slight tug at that invisible string had me moving closer. I willed my feet to stop, but they continued on their path. It wasn't until a voice broke through the drumming in my ears that I halted only a few feet from him.

"Aurelia…" Feyre's words interjected my thoughts softly. A beckoning tone in her voice. She knew. She had seen it all through me. In my delirium, I had let my mental shields falter, and who knows what I had been screaming at her. I shook my head and met her eyes. Her brows creased, but she smiled with understanding. She spoke to me mind to mind, _Are you alright? I…felt you…and your…bond._ I nodded and confusion contorted my face again. My eyes spun back to the High Lord. I took in every inch of him. My heart swelled at the very sight of him. The way his eyes had turned so soft. His posture had changed to a relaxed and poised stance. His lips set into a doting smile, all just for me. His golden hair blowing in the breeze as it carried the scent of roses, and heavy woods. His scent. It filled my senses and made everything brighter.

I flushed crimson as he stepped closer eyeing me for approval. I didn't move. My heart quickened, and my body tensed. Not in fear of what he might do, but fear of what I did not understand. I opened my mouth to speak, but Cassian blurted, "Lay a hand on her, and I'll make sure your _balls_ are displayed in MY study." He accentuated the two words with a certain malice that confusion again overcame me. A firm hand clasped my shoulder. Cassian stood behind me pulling me toward the entryway from which we came. "I don't care what you felt Auri. He is not the one for you." His tone was reserved, cold. The voice he saved for intimidating his enemies. I looked back over my shoulder at him once more. His beautiful emerald eyes lined with silver as if he was in pain at the sight of me leaving. I gave him a soft look before the doors to the entryway slammed shut. "Why?" the words came out harsher than I had anticipated. Cassian froze and spun on his heel. "That is not my story to tell." He ran his hand down his face in frustration and sighed. "He's done…terrible things." The words hit me like a fist to the gut. I paused and whispered, "What sort of things?" Cassian merely shook his head before stating, "Not my story. Ask Rhys. He will be thrilled to hear that you've found your mate in a…" He stopped himself and frowned his voice taking on a certain edge that had a shiver crawling down my spine as he said, "Auri, just stay away from him." He stepped closer and held my gaze placing either hand on my shoulders. "Promise me you will stay away until you talk to Rhys." I frowned, but nodded to him in agreement, even if the simple gesture stung like a hot blade to my skin.

"Good." He murmured and smiled his playful smile, it did not reach his eyes. "You had better fly ahead of us to the house of wind. We will catch up with you in a moment." I opened my mouth to protest, but Cassian was already through the double doors leading to the foyer. I sighed heavily and quickly reran what had just happened. _My mate._ The inner voice cooed at me, and my heart thudded wildly in my chest in response. I turned my head to the window. The brisk wind rustled the lilac gossamer curtains on either side and tickled my wings. I flared them softly as I stepped closer to the edge. One step over and I was falling. My mind cleared and the scent of sea and citrus filled the air. I opened my wings to their full capacity and I was one with the wind. It carried me across the sky is a smooth glide. The clouds caressed the tender flesh of the membranes. I cataloged the city skyline as I neared Velaris. The beauty of it sending a smile to lips and a squeeze to my heart. _Home._ My mind purred as my smiled softened.

I neared the House of Wind and banked left to land atop the smooth mountaintop. Even in the darkness, I saw him, standing atop the enormous building. Rhys stood with his hands in his pockets and stared up at the star-flecked sky. His face fixed in what looked to be concern or confusion or both. I pulled my wings back and swiftly landed in front of him. I laid my head into a bow, "Good evening, High Lord." He stared at me a moment longer lost in his thoughts, I shifted under the weight of his eyes. Even after all these years I still found him intimidating at times, he was gentle but protective. He cared for me like a brother would care for a sister, a feat that I would forever be grateful for. "The others will be on their way shortly." He nodded softly, "I know." He murmured, barely a whisper. I frowned and chewed the inside of my lip, "You know then…" I lowered my head and waited for his reprimand, but it never came. "Auri, walk with me. We have much to discuss, and I'm afraid not very much time to do so." His smile did not reach his eyes as he came to stand at my side, "I need to tell you a very important story about my mother, and sister." We walked together down the steps of the house toward the dining room, and in the whisper of the wind he to me a tale of betrayal, revenge, and a heavy sadness.

 **Tamlin**

My breaths came quickly as I sized up the warrior before me. His eyes blazed with a protective glint and he stood as if ready to brawl. "Where is she?" I asked looking past him to the doors she had disappeared through. Cassian folded his arms but remained silent. "Please, Cassian. Where is she?" I willed my voice to a plea and relaxed my taut body. Given my…history with the Illyrians I knew this was going to be hard enough as it was, no need for me to be abrasive. I calmed the primal mating instincts and waited for his reply. Cassian rolled his eyes and shook his head before unfolding his arms. "I sent her ahead of us to the House of Wind. Rhys was waiting for her there." Cassian looked to Feyre and she gave a shallow nod as if in confirmation of his statement. She then turned her attention back to me and frowned slightly, "Tamlin…" She trailed my name with such concern as she continued, "She is fragile. A magnificently skilled warrior and worthy opponent in combat, but she is…" She paused and choked on a small sob. "She's trying to find her place in this world. It's been twenty years since she came to live in Velaris, and she still has not completely acclimated." Her frown deepened as she added, "Despite our efforts to include her." I frowned in return and whispered gently, "Perhaps she was missing something vital…" The words were vain, but I knew she of all people would understand.

Her eyes met mine and she sighed softly. "Please just give her time to process this. She's confused and she will need time to truly grasp the weight of it all." I stared at her for a moment silently debating if I had the strength to abide by her wishes. My eyes cut to Cassian who surveyed me through narrowed eyes. His lips a thin line. I winced under the weight of it and turned back to Feyre and nodded in agreement. "I will do whatever she needs of me." Feyre smiled softly and nodded, "Thank you." I shrugged my shoulders slightly and surveyed the two Illyrian males.

"So…I would assume by those looks I am taking the stairs?" A smile set in on my lips and I laughed a breathy laugh. Feyre rolled her eyes but returned my smile. The Illyrians relaxed slightly and shared a look between each other. The shadowsinger stepped forward and threw a thumb over his shoulder toward Cassian, "It's safe to say that I will be the one transporting you. I can't trust Cassian to not 'accidentally' drop you." I looked over his shoulder at the malicious grin spreading across Cassian's face. My throat went dry and I nodded in agreement. We prepared for flight, and my stomach twisted. Azriel had instructed me on what to do, and I had listened intently.

We took position on the veranda. One moment we were on the glimmering black marble floor, the next we launched into the sky. I closed my eyes and waited for it to be over. "Welcome to Velaris." The shadowsinger said as I opened my eyes. My jaw dropped as the skyline came into view. The city sparkled with a certain resilience. The starlight reflected in the wide spans of sea was breathtaking. From the north bits and pieces of colorful buildings peaked into view. My mouth hung open in the awe of it. The beauty of the ancient, secret city. We banked left and began to near a large flat topped mountain. Small windows and doors embellished the stone, where light glimmered behind them. The Illyrians shifted their wings and we began our decent right toward it. Before I knew it, we were landing. The wind whistling past us in the cool night. "Welcome to the House of Wind, Tamlin." Feyre said as she gestured to the calm city. The sound of footsteps on the nearby stairs interrupted the howling wind, and Rhys appeared before all of us. His face was calm, collected, but the smile he wore did not quite reach his eyes. "Welcome, Tamlin." He murmured as he motioned for us to descend the stairs. "Come now, we have _many_ things to discuss." His words sent a shudder of guilt and pain through me. I nodded and countered his statement with, "Indeed we do."


	3. New Beginnings

Aurelia

I stood at the window of my bedroom running a hand over the delicate gossamer curtains. The gentle breeze that tickled my skin sent a shudder through me. Images Rhys had shown me earlier this evening danced in my head and my heart drummed violently in response. At first, what I had seen confused me. The images from long ago when Rhys was just a boy. The face he looked to and admired had so much resembled….my own. His mother, his sister…they both had been viciously slaughtered and mutilated. The shock of the deed alone was enough to make my heart ache, but the ones responsible…I shuddered again. Though Tamlin's father had been the one with hate in his heart, Tamlin still carried their blood on his hands. Tears welled in my eyes as I remembered the images of their beautiful lifeless bodies. Their wings absent. Rage raced through my veins like fire and ice and my siphons glared in response. I screamed out the window into the rustling wind of the mountain. My legs became weak and I fell softly to my knees letting my sobs overcome my body. The siphons slowly cooled back to their dark purple swirling with the power held beneath. A knock at the door startled me, but I didn't move.

"Go away…" It was hardly a whisper, but whoever had knocked entered anyway. I didn't turn to them before I said, "He murdered them." I finally turned to face whoever it was standing there. Azriel stood still as the night itself. He carefully glanced over me, his eyes falling upon my swollen red eyes. His mouth twisted into a slight frown and he nodded. I didn't need to explain who I had meant. He had been there. He had seen the damage the spring court had caused. The reckless violence. "Though he was partially responsible, I believe the blood of them both lays on the hands of the late High Lord." His voice was so soft. It soothed my bones and helped me gain the courage to stand. I shook my head and moved to sit on the edge of the four-post bed near the window.

"This is all so messy, so wrong. How is he, my mate? Someone who is responsible for the death of two of my kind? How can this be right?" I spoke the questions aloud for the first time in hours. Azriel moved silently to stand before me. He kneeled before me and his eyes met mine. His hand found mine, and a wave of calm overcame my senses. I lifted my gaze to his and sighed softly. We sat there for a moment in silence letting the calm settle before he spoke, "Nothing in this world is ever clear. We are given what we are given, and we are to make the best of it." He smiled to soothe the bite of the words, "Fate has a sly way of appearing undesirable at first, but slowly growing into something you become fond of. Perhaps even love in time." His eyes held mine again as he continued, "Had Feyre never followed her wicked fate we all would be in a much different situation." His slight wince said enough about the pain he had endured, and I grasped his hand in understanding.

My breath was shaky as I spoke, "Can I truly…reject this bond? Rhys said there would always be a pull to him, but…" I trailed off. Even speaking of rejecting Tamlin sent a pain to my chest and a harsh stinging to my eyes. The bond I had felt if even for a moment was strong. My whole body had responded to him, moved with him. In that moment standing with him, I had felt whole. Now my body felt feather-light. A fragile soul locked inside a powerful body. Azriel stood, but did not release my hand, "Only time will tell what your heart will choose." His soft smile soothing me. "Auri, learn for yourself what you want, and all of us will stand with you." I frowned remembering Cassian's words _He's not the one for you, Auri._ "Cassian seemed set on not allowing me to accept." Azriel laugh a low chuckle and pulled me to my feet, "And since when do you let Cassian tell you what to do?" A smile broke out on my face and I laughed softly. I wiped the tears from my eyes and sighed, "Thank you, Azriel. For everything." He shrugged and released my hand lifting it to rest on my shoulder. "That's what friends do." He smiled a small smile and moved for the door. He turned to face me with his hand on the knob, "The meeting is over if you'd like to come down. If not I understand." He stood still as stone like he was made of shadow itself. I looked toward the window for a moment, then back at him and smiled, "Maybe in a little while. For now," I threw a thumb over my shoulder and gestured to the open window, "I think I'd like to clear my mind." He nodded and smiled before exiting the room. In one swift movement, he was gone.

My footsteps carried me closer to the balcony's edge. The floor falling away from the mountain with no rail of metal to hold me back. I closed my eyes and breathed in the scent of the sea. The salt of the air filling my senses. My wings unfurled into a massive stretch of black skin, and I stepped to the edge allowing myself to free fall once more. My mind silenced completely. The mechanics of flying were second nature to me at my age, and my wings began to respond before my thought had even registered. Slow, deep, flaps of my wings brought me high into the night. I tucked my wings in tight and spun my body in an upward spiral. The cool air kissing my warmed flesh. The wind whistled as I soared over the vast forest surrounding Velaris. I scanned the sky, and my heart squeezed at the beauty of the night. The stars twinkled in a spectacular display as if it were dancing for only me. I swayed with the breeze back and forth letting the wind catch underneath my wings. The cool air felt heavenly beneath them, and I once again felt at peace.

After some time, I swiftly landed near the edge of a steady stream. The water fell over the rocks in such ways the forest filled with the sound of it. Peaceful. A good place to think for a while. I settled into the roots of an ancient pine near the edge of a clearing and closed my eyes for a moment. When had I gotten so tired? My body relaxed under the warmth of my cloak, and though I knew I shouldn't I cleared my mind, and slowly drifted to sleep.

Tamlin

Rhys stood on the opposite side of the dining hall staring out the vast window beholding the city. One hand rested within his pocket, the other gripping the glass of amber liquid. The rest of his court had excused themselves after the meeting. Even Lucien had given his regrets in relation to his own personal matters. So, I sat in silence for what seemed like eternity. Through the silence, I could hear the wind whistling, and could have sworn I saw giant black wings fly out toward the forest. A gentle pull at the bond told me my suspicions were not misplaced. Worry clouded my thoughts, and I was just about to rise from my chair when Rhysand's voice broke the silence, "She is quite capable of taking care of herself, Tamlin." The soft bite left on my name told me just how he felt about this specific situation.

"Rhysand, she…She shouldn't be out there alone." He stiffened at my response and whirled a smirk of pure malice upon his face as he breathed, "What would you have me do? Lock her in? I believe we both know how that would end." I narrowed my eyes at him and folded my hands into fists. "That was a mistake..." The words fell from my lips but honest rang in each one. I relaxed and sighed standing to move to the window. "With Feyre, it was a mistake. She didn't need my protection anymore, and some selfish part of me wanted to be _her_ protector." I shook my head and frowned. "My heart was there, but my mind was so lost in what had happened to her…." I trailed off as I felt Rhysand shift uncomfortably like he would rather talk about anything but those horrid things we had both witnessed.

"I never told you that, or her." I sighed again clapping a hand to my neck, and rubbing it slightly. "I just never really knew what to say. The day I had decided to join you in the war was the day I realized what an arrogant fool I'd been." Rhysand faced me leaning a shoulder against the large pane of glass and smiled slightly, "I believe what you are trying to say is 'Sorry for being such a tool.'" His smile widened and he cocked his head slightly. I rolled my eyes and nodded slightly, "Whatever works for you Rhys." I smiled and raised my hand, my glass appearing seconds later. I lifted the glass toward him, "To new beginnings, and old friends." Rhysand looked to me for a moment and lifted his own glass, "To our future as allies, and possibly family." He clinked his glass to mine. We both drank in silence.

Rhysand stilled suddenly and turned his attention back to the forest, scanning each tree with precision. The doors to the dining hall flew open and the commander and shadowsinger entered. Worried faces looking to Rhys. The shadowsinger stepped forward. "She went out flying. She said she needed to clear her mind. I thought nothing of it…" His words trailed off with what seemed like apology in his tone. Rhysand's tone was cold as he spoke, "Both of you get prepared to scout the forest." He turned to me and then back to the pane of glass between us and the night air. "It looks like you get to play protector one last time, get what you need and meet me back here in five minutes." In his look an icy rage lingered, but concern touched those hard features. What awaited us in the forest, I didn't know. My breaths quickened, as that very same rage and concern crept into my veins. My bandolier of knives appeared, and I stepped toward the balcony, "What do you need of me?"


	4. Fight or Flight

Aurelia

I awoke to the rustle of leaves and branches. Footsteps. I heard the low registering growl a minute later and my eyes snapped open. I was on my feet and holding my body in preparation to fight. The growls surrounded me then. Ever moving closer and closer. In haste, I searched the forest floor for the most decent weapon-like object I could use to my defense. The darkness was so muddled in the thickness of the trees overhanging I could barely see my hands in front of my own body as I leaned down closer to the ground to forage for anything to help me evade the predators before me.

My hand collided with something sharp and my eyes stung. A moment later I felt the warmth and wetness trickle down my fingers, and I knew I was bleeding. I calmed my senses and willed myself to concentrate. Slowing my movements to not draw attention to myself. Something tugged at my senses and a gentle caress of power ran down my spine. I relaxed at the touch, the scent that followed washed over me like a wave of calm. Though my mind protested my body answered. He was here, he had found me.

One moment I was in the darkness, unable to find my way. The next my eyes shifted. It was as if someone had poured the light of every star into the clearing. A tug at my waist told me who was responsible for the new-found ability. Blinding blue and white light filled the clearing, illuminating every detail. I narrowed my eyes to slits and willed my eyes to adjust. Then I saw them. Six shadow wraiths neared the edge of the clearing now. The tendrils of smoke and shadow leaking from their ancient skin swirled in violent haze. The night wind whirled the foul stench of rot and infection my way and my stomach churned. Their teeth chattered as they shared glances between one another. Their mute tongues clicked in abhorrent rhythms against their dagger-like teeth. A slow and steady chorus of cackles sounded from them, and my skin crawled.

They inched closer readying to pounce. My mind cleared, and I sucked in a deep breath. In a flash, I was hurling myself toward them. Weapon or not, I wasn't going down without a fight. My fist met flesh and bone and I heard a crack. A screech of pain had me stepping back before I winnowed behind the others. I danced around them fluidly, their mouths coming so dangerously close to my flesh, and I twisted to evade their strikes and lunges. Winnowing every few strikes and narrowly escaping their jaws and talons. A rustling in the brush behind me had me spinning to investigate the source when a sharp pain radiated through the sensitive skin at the base of my wings. I cried out in agony.

I felt the teeth of the wraith dig deeper into my skin as I shook its mouth off my skin before sending a spear of unrelenting power down through my siphons straight to its gut. The purple light filled the clearing illuminating the wraiths in an eerie light. I could feel the power dwindling from my siphons. The bite alone had weakened me. _Venom._ The thought ravaged my mind, and the trees before me began spinning. The stars above became a blur of lines, and I shook my head and blinked heavily. I tried to shake off the effects of the wraith's venom but to no avail. I stepped forward and my stance faltered. Their cackles echoed through the clearing and my heart sank. _This can't be it…this can't be the end!_ I thought and blinked heavily again.

My sight began to falter again under the damper the venom had released on my power. My legs became weak, and my body grew tired. Sleep. I wanted to sleep. I frowned and fought against the effects of the venom. I willed my body to stand firm and began to move toward the wraiths.

A deep bellowing roar sounded through the clearing, and I snapped my attention to the direction of the sound. A large beast of lupine build stood before me. It's elk like horns reached unending for the sky, and its golden fur flowed in the soft breeze. Its massive body stood taut in the flowing breeze around it, and when our eyes met I knew who that beast was. It was the eyes that had sent a wave of relief over me. It's eyes that had me moving toward it, not cowering from it. Those emerald, gold-flecked eyes. The eyes I couldn't remove from my memory. My heart squeezed, and a soft smile found my lips. Tamlin scanned me for signs of injury and faltered as they found my face. No doubt, pale and glistening with sweat. I could feel the fever falling over me. He closed his eyes and a rushing wind of spring grass and soft wildflowers overcame my senses.

How he had done it, I did not know. In an instant, I felt my strength return to me and I looked up to meet his eyes. He turned slightly revealing the Illyrian blades strapped to his back. I rushed to him grabbing the double ended fighting blade. Our eyes met once more and a smile played in his eyes. In unison, we struck. His blows countered mine in a swift dance. In harmony, we moved skillfully bringing about blow after blow until one by one the wraiths fell to nothing more than ribbons. Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel had arrived just as Tamlin and I shredded the last of them, together. We stood in the clearing for another minute, no words between us. Just the sound of our relentless panting.

His eyes met mine, and he lowered his stare to the wound at my shoulder. The beast disappeared in the flash of a blinding golden light, and Tamlin in all his strength and glory stood before me. His brows creased as he searched every inch of my body for signs of any additional wounds I had received. The adrenaline began to slip as I looked away from him and said, "I'm fine." My words were barely a whisper, and a shudder ran through me as I turned to meet my brothers at the edge of the clearing.

A sharp pain seared through the flesh of my back and I cried out in agony. Two strong hands caught my body before it could falter and held me close. The warmth of them was enough to lull me into sleep. _Sleep…Yes, sleep_. The hands slipped along my back, careful not to touch the ever-sensitive wound. The other hand slipped under my knees and in one soft movement, I was in his arms. My head fell against Tamlin's neck and I heard his voice in my ear, a soft plea as he said, "Don't leave me, not yet, please don't leave me, Aurelia" His whispers sent a tingle over my skin. Every inch of me relaxed in his touch, and my mind whirled. The night sky began to spin again, and I began to shiver. I was so cold. I couldn't even feel the warmth of his body against mine, "I'm…c. ." I muttered. A near breathless response. Tamlin looked down at me and I noticed the silver lining his eyes. I raised a weak hand to his face and cupped his cheek in my palm. He closed his eyes leaning into my touch. A soft smile touched my lips, then darkness found me as my body slipped out of consciousness.

Tamlin

I stood in the dining room of the House of Wind. The room had become too still, too quiet since the chaotic return from the forest. I had paced the space surrounding the open balcony doors over a hundred times. I fidgeted with my bandolier of knives and finally unlatched them before throwing them across the room with a loud thud. I stopped pacing and leaned back against the wall slowly sliding down it until I sat with my head in my hands. My mind swirled with unending concern and frustration. It had been hours since we had returned from the forest. Blood still coated my tunic. I rubbed my face, and frowned into my open palms, dried blood coated them as well and a lump surfaced in my throat _. Mother, please hold her. Please don't take her from me._ I sent up my silent prayer and lowered my head. Footsteps sounded on the far side of the room, and I shot upward, eager to receive any news on her condition. A pair of hazel eyes in the shadows of the room found mine, and I tensed under his stare. I frowned and moved closer to the table, a safe distance from him.

"Any news on her condition?" I spoke softly. Willing my voice to be calm instead of the overall panic in my mind. The commander softly sighed and stepped forward. "She's alive. The venom sank deep. It took…extraordinary methods of healing to bring her back from it." He frowned and shook his head as if to shake away the images of his protégé in the condition she was. "She is alive, and well. The healer demanded she rest, but Auri…" He paused as if reconsidering his next words, "She asked to see you." I paused and weighed the caution in his voice. "And…am I permitted to visit her?"

Cassian looked to the floor and answered with a soft growl to his voice, "I am not her keeper and she may do what she wishes." I stepped around the table until I was mere feet away from him, "Then please, bring me to her." My voice cracked as I pleaded with him to let me see her. His eyes snapped to mine at the longing in my voice. They softened slightly and he frowned, "Thank you, for…saving her life. I am eternally grateful." He did not bow but lowered his chin in a sign of respect. I nodded in response, and shook my head, "I would go to the ends of the earth to keep her from harm." Silence fell over us, and Cassian motioned for me to follow him.

I fell into step behind him down the alabaster hall to the living quarters. We walked in brisk silence. The only sound, our footsteps reverberating off the polished stone floors. We stopped before a beautifully ornate hand-carved door. The details displayed flowers of jasmine and peony intertwining in such intricate detail. I marveled at the work before me as Cassian's voice interrupted my thoughts. "She carved this one herself." He smiled slightly and continued, "Auri could always find the beauty in anything." He nodded toward the door and stepped aside. "She is expecting you, but don't try anything stupid. I'll be right here the whole time." His eyes narrowed softly, an older brother protecting his fragile sister. Both of us knew she needed no protection. What had happened in the forest had been a rarity, but Cassian's love for her was some-what comforting. I nodded softly in thanks, and opened the door.


	5. Bonded

Aurelia

I awoke to the whistle of the wind outside my bedroom window. Its song danced in my head as I rolled slightly onto my side. The movement sent a sliver of discomfort down my back. My muscles groaned in protest as I sat up slowly. The shadow wraith's venom had penetrated the muscle tissue of my back. The bite spread from the crook of my neck to the tip of my shoulder-blade. A blue-black webbing of veins spread from one end to the other. The mark of the poison lingering within my skin. I reached back to rub at the aching muscles of my shoulder. I winced as my fingers met the soreness and dropped my hand back to the bed. Feyre had done all she could to heal the gaping wound, but her blood could only hasten my healing so much. The wound had closed, and the healer had said I would regain function of my wing when the venom passed, but how long before that happened she did not know. I looked out the window at the soaring birds. Their wings carried them gracefully toward the towering mountains of Velaris. A lump rose in my throat and a tear slid down my face. I couldn't fly. Not for a while at least, and a small part of my heart caved for just a moment.

A voice sounded from behind my closed door, and I listened closer. Cassian spoke low enough that I could not understand him. His tone was dangerous. A warning to whoever was there with him. I had asked him hours ago to find Tamlin and bring him to me. He had sulked off muttering about how he'd rather gouge out his own eyes, and I thought that had been the end of that. A familiar prescience overcame my senses, and I didn't need to hear his voice to know he was there. I felt him as he stood on the other side of that door. I slowly moved each leg to swing over the side of my bed. I stood warily reaching for my dressing robe, and slug it on gritting my teeth at the pain the movement had caused. My head spun slightly and I took a step back toward the bed sitting on the edge. I covered my silk nightgown and waited for him to enter.

The knob clicked and I swore I wasn't breathing. My heart picked up its pace. I fidgeted with the lace cuff of the robe and eyed the door. It opened a fraction and he entered gracefully. That tug in my abdomen went taut, and it was an effort to keep myself from moving to him. His eyes met mine and did a quick once-over, his gaze landing on the inky black marks on my shoulder. His eyes softened and his brows creased with worry. "I'm fine…Tamlin." I could have sworn I felt a tickle of pleasure from that bond between us. His response to his own name on my lips. His eyes again traced over my body in a loving caress. They widened slightly and a brief arrogant smile tugged at his lips. I rolled my eyes in disgust but felt my own lips twisting into a grin. I loosed a small laughed and shook my head. "This form of dress is to your liking, I presume?" I bit softly. He raised his eyes and met mine. Pure amusement upon his face, "Quite so, but given the circumstances…" he paused and lowered his voice taking a smooth step closer to the bed, "It's already hard enough for me to keep my hands to myself." I blushed deeply and bit my lip just as a low growl sounded from the hallway. I pinned my lips together to avoid the outright cry of laughter that was rising in my throat.

I swung my legs back into the bed. I tried to position my wings over the pillows as the healer had but I was so weak, so tired from what had happened. I felt him at my side before I saw him. My whole body tensed. I turned my head to meet his gaze. His hands were slightly outstretched to help, he smiled softly down at me and whispered, "May I?" I stared at him nervously. _May I touch your wings._ That's what he had meant. I pressed my lips together contemplating an alternative. It was too intimate. The room before us seemed to grow smaller in the silence between us. I studied his stance, and cocked my head whispering, "Why?" He lowered his hands to his side and tucked them into his pockets. As if he needed to stow them before he reached too close. He sighed softly and nodded toward my wings, "I know how precious they are to you…to your kind." He looked at the floor, his features displaying the memory he now witnessed. I frowned knowing exactly which memory he was reliving. My heart squeezed and my shoulders tightened sending a ripple of soreness down my back.

My breath caught in my throat as I surprised myself by uttering, "Please, be gentle." His eyes lifted to mine as I sat upright a little more granting him access to my wings. My heart pounded wildly beneath my breast and I knew he heard it. He leaned down hovering over me, and I held my breath for the touch. His hands gingerly lifted my injured wing over the pillow and positioned it to fan just right over it. His touch sent shivers of pleasure through me. The hairs on my skin rose as that ripple of pleasure spread through every inch of me. I closed my eyes and stifled the moan rising in my throat, just as my wing twitched slightly. He paused and began backing away, His voice was soft but husky as he said, "I'm sorry I didn't mean to…" I snapped my eyes to his and blurted, "No!" My face heated and I could feel the pounding in my chest increase. "I meant, don't stop. You're…you're not hurting me…If that's what you thought." I smiled apologetically at him feeling a slight ease nestle between us. He paused and pressed his lips together before slowly running his hand over the other wing. The gentle stroke had me curling my toes and biting my lip again. I couldn't control the moan that slipped from my lips this time.

He chuckled under his breath as he fanned my other wing over the pillow ever so gently and sat at the end of my bed. His eyes scanned every inch of me like he wanted to catalog the way I looked right then and there. "You're…so beautiful." He whispered as his eyes met mine. My face heated, and I lowered my eyes to my hands. His voice came like velvet, "No…Look at me." I bit the edge of my lip and lifted my eyes to meet his. The bond again went rigid, and I felt him in that moment. His overwhelming affection for me, and what I swore was regret. My breath caught again, and tears filled my eyes. He slowly glanced over my features. My Illyrian hazel eyes now rimmed with silver, my full lips that tugged up at the edges, my long dark hair that flowed in loose curls down and over the peaks of my breasts. His eyes lingered a moment on my toned but supple body. My lip quivered as his face fell into one of torment. I frowned saying, "What are you thinking?" His eyes never left the floor as he replied, "I'm thinking how much better your life would be without me in it…" He shook his head and laughed with no amusement. "I've caused such pain to you already. To your kind as well. There will never be a day when I look back on what I've done and not regret it." His words caught in his throat and he raised his head meeting my stare again, "Rhys was my friend once, and I betrayed him." I looked away from him then not wanting him to see the tears that welled in my eyes. This was too difficult, too messy. Everything within me wanted him, craved to know him completely, but my sense of honor and love for my people held me back.

We sat in silence a moment as I pondered the outcomes of each scenario this relationship could face. It must have been some time for when he spoke I started just a bit. "You look like her…Rhys' mother." He trailed off again, and my veins turned to ice. He lowered his gaze to the floor and spoke again, "I never forgot their faces, never forgot how beautiful they both were." He shook his head and continued, "As you know, my father grew weary of Rhysand's growing power. He thought that if he could eliminate him, that any threat he posed in the night court would be nullified. My father was a very cruel man. He saw an opportunity to wipe Rhys off the earth and he leaped. When we landed and he found not Rhys, but his mother and sister, he went mad. He mutilated them merely out of spite for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. And yet, though my hands never touched their skin I am just as sadistic and guilt for allowing such actions to be taken. There is not a day that goes by that I don't wish to have changed my actions." I sat up and leaned forward slightly listening to every missing detail of Rhysand's memory.

"I watched my father send their heads down the river to the camp, collect their wings and winnow back to the spring court. It was enough to make my stomach churn. The sight of their lifeless bodies. The pools of blood at their backs on the snow. I was a coward, a traitorous coward who didn't deserve the friendship of someone as good as Rhys." My tears had begun flowing down my cheeks and he loosed a sigh of unrest. "I don't deserve you, Aurelia. You are everything that is kind and innocent. You are powerful, and beautiful beyond words and I…." His words caught as he shook his head. "I'm just a fool. An arrogant fool, with a temper who brings destruction to the lives of those I care about." He did not meet my gaze, did not dare look at me.

I choked back a sob and shook my head softly, "We all have things about ourselves we wish we could change. The challenge is to find the beauty within them." My voice was low, soft. "Tamlin, when I look at you I do not see a murderer. I do not see jealousy, anger, or hate," I moved closer to him slowly folding my legs to kneel next to him on the bed. My hand found his cheek and I pulled his chin slightly to face me, "I see you. Not the High Lord of Spring, not the man of all those years ago. I see _you_." His hand found my own and a tickle of happiness found my heart. "Let me know you, for who you truly are. Teach me all that you are, and all you ever will be." His eyes met mine, silver lined and pleading. My heart squeezed, and I pressed my free hand to his heart. "It's what lies within here that truly matters." He smiled at me and my body went taut.

He could have had right then and there, pain or no. I swallowed hard, and he shook his head laughing breathlessly. He smiled with apology in his eyes, "You'll have to forgive me. These newfound emotional outbursts are…difficult to deal with. Especially for me." He laughed and the sound sent a shiver of pleasure through me. This was so wrong…I shouldn't want him, shouldn't even want to be near him, and yet part of me wanted to believe there was good within him. That maybe, his demons were truly in the past. Every inch of me yearned to know him, love him. The tears that had welled in my eyes spilled over and ran down my cheeks. He pulled my hand into his and smoothly twirled gentle circles in my palm. The calluses on his hands gently caressing my own. I blushed at the contact, but never looked away from him. The silver that lined his eyes poured over as he opened his mouth to speak, "I vow to you," he began his voice soft and smooth, "That I will be everything you need. That I will walk this earth with you as my equal in every way. You will never know grief at my hands. I will hold your life above all others. From this moment, I am yours. Eternally." As if he had used magic I felt the bond between us go taut once more as if the magic of it strengthened under his words. Before I could breathe my mouth found his.

My heart raced as I took in the full power of him. The softness of his lips. The gentle hand he had placed on my waist. For what seemed like eternity his lips caressed mine until he softly broke away. I stared up at him my expression heavy with desire. "Later…" he mused, a smile resting on his now swollen lips. He brushed the loose tendrils of hair from my face. "I want nothing more than to stay here with you, but we have many things to discuss," he paused, his eyes falling to the venom again his brows creasing slightly. "And you need rest." He smiled a half smile and gipped my hand, lacing his fingers with mine. My breath caught and a shudder of pleasure ran through me. He bent and placed a kiss on the top of my hand. I blushed and smiled just as exhaustion hit me. I fought to keep my eyes open, but I knew it was pointless. I felt his fingers slip from mine, and I could have sworn I heard him whisper, "I love you." I let the words, be of my imagination or not, soothe me into deep sleep. There in that slumber, I dreamt of roses, rolling green hills, and the High Lord. A beast of torment and yearning.


	6. ACOBAY Author Update Hello Dreamers

I AM BACK!

Hello to all of you that have so graciously and patiently waited for me! It's been over a year since my last chapter, but hold on tight! Things in my life went wayward fast last year, but the time away really helped me become stronger. The next chapter is coming sooner than you think! Stay tuned. I appreciate each and everyone of you 3


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